Dear future husband,
How are you? Are you happy, or sad? Are you in a season of breaking, or breakthrough? I wonder how you look like; what are your favorites, the things that break your heart, where your happy place is, or what your comfort food is. I’m excited to know you, but not yet today, maybe someday.
Today is Heart’s Day or also known as Valentine’s Day. I see sweet couples everywhere I go. Vendors of chocolates, teddy bears, heart balloons and of course, overpriced bouquets in every corner of the street. These people has indeed painted the town red!
Good news for you (bad news for me): I’m dating nobody. I’m one of those single ladies who won’t be receiving any flowers from her special someone, and probably will be just staying the whole day at home.
And yes, honestly speaking, I get a little bit bitter and envious at the same time for being single on a Valentine’s day. I feel even worse seeing younger people who have dates and are being surprised by their boyfriends. And here I am, a graduating college student, single. Plus the pressure from my relatives bugging me with questions: “Baket wala kang ka-date?” “Yung totoo hija, tomboy ka ba?” As if I’m answering a Miss Universe’ pageant question. But I would just smile and say “Wala pa po eh. Di pa sya dumating.”
But hey, it’s okay – I’m dating nobody because I want to be faithful to you even though I haven’t met you yet. Let me do my very best to keep my fidelity to you even with the smallest thing; to preserve my purity in all aspects. This is the very least thing that I could do in preparing myself to be a blessing to you because I honor you.
Do not awaken love until the time is right. (Song of Songs 8:4)
Love, let us both patiently wait until God’s perfect time for us. Let us not rush things to happen, neither manipulate it with our own hands but just let the best Author of love write our story. Let us both take this season of waiting as a season of letting God mold us into the man and woman He wants us to become.
But truth be told, waiting is not as easy it looks like. Things are a lot easier said than done. And if time will come that I’ll be tempted to just settle for the good enough, let God’s grace remind me to wait a little more – that I’m waiting for the man He has planned for me, and sure you’re worth it.
I’m not waiting for you just because I want someone to give me chocolates and flowers, that would be cool but it’s not the main goal.
Someone who doesn’t just give me butterflies in my stomach, but someone who I’m comfortable with just being myself, without any filters. I hope and pray you’re someone who’ll not just be proud of my strengths but also will accept my flaws. Know that there will be moments that I’ll be discouraged and will be tempted to give up. I’ll not be always strong, but I hope you’re willing to stay by my side even during my down moments.
Someone I eagerly want to listen to because I learn a lot from his revelations from God through his devotion. A wise man who gets his wisdom from fearing the Lord. But at the same time, someone who’s also willing to listen to my endless rants when I’m burnt-out from work, or just really being moody.
I’ll remind myself that I’m waiting for someone who doesn’t just inspire me to be a better person, but leads me to the next level with my relationship with God. Someone who’ll push me closer to Him rather than to himself; who’ll constantly remind me that I should not depend on him but only to our Maker. We’ll pray, worship, and read the bible together. We’ll be partners in ministry, supporting each other’s calling.
I’m waiting for someone whom I can grow with, for I know you are not perfect, same here! You and I will always be a work in progress. So let’s give allowances with each other’s short comings. Let’s be patient enough when one of us fails, and be graciously forgiving with each other’s faults. Let’s not only encourage but also lovingly rebuke each other if needed.
And lastly, I’m waiting for a man who doesn’t just love me, but who is spirit-filled, for I know your love alone will not be enough to accept my imperfection. Know that I will not be easy to love. There will be times that you’ll not understand my tantrums or that I’ll be too needy and petty. But I’m praying that the Holy Spirit will be your Paraclete, to enable you to stick with me no matter what.
You’re maybe not the one
but one thing I’m sure of – you’ll be God-given. Know that wherever you are right now, I’m praying for you. And whatever or whoever you are, with all your imperfection – let me love you.
Love, I don’t know how long we still need to wait. But let’s not focus on that; rather let’s focus in going deeper with our relationship God. Let it not become the main desires of our hearts and just surrender it all to Him. For if it’s really His will, fate shall make a way for us to meet when we’re both ready for it.
And matter how long it may take, let me still wait.
Your Future Wife